The end of an era
So this is it. Three years of hard work, laughter and tears, of dreams and disappointments, all come to a close.
We graduated from Central School of Ballet last Sunday, and it was an amazing day. The whole weekend was surreal actually, last Saturday night was our final Ballet Central show, and it was incredibly emotional. We were all very tired because there had been a very busy rehearsal and performance schedule at the Unicorn theatre that week with all the school shows, so by the time it came to Saturday, all the chips were down and it was hard to deal with.
I was a wreck. I couldn't stop crying, and for about two hours before I went on, I didn't really talk to anyone (extremely unusual for me!) I did Cinderella and the second movement of Steps to Bach, and as I knelt on the floor looking at Tom for the last time, I just couldn't control myself and there were tears running down my face. After coming off from steps, Amy and I hugged each other in a kind of daze- the last time we would ever do that piece and the last time on stage as Ballet Central. The whole company went on at the end for one last curtain call, and some first and second years threw flowers at us. The curtain came down, and everyone turned to each other, and the full weight of what had ended and what was just beginning really hit us. It wasn't exactly sad, but very poignant and I ended up totally drained.
On Sunday, the mood was very different. More celebration, more hope for the future and of course, excitement about having a summer holiday! We did our solos for the assessors, which went ok, but felt very much like an assessment. Then we performed them for the audience of friends and family, and it was great. The audience were really appreciative, and I thought my solo went really well. It wasn't very sad that day. Sometimes when I do it I feel such a sense of loss and sadness that I almost end up crying at the end of it even in the studio, but on Sunday it felt more like an expression of hope and longing, probably because that was more my overriding mood that day. After I came off, I joined the mayhem backstage of girls flying around to get ready in posh frocks in a quarter of the time we would normally take to get ready for a normal day. Everyone had lovely dresses (they had been a favorite topic of conversation for a while!) In a record amount of time, we were all ready and standing on stage ready to receive our diplomas and listen to the speeches.
It was incredibly moving. I have been to the past years ceremonies, and nothing prepares you for the fact that one day, you will be standing there, about to go out into the big wide world too. there was prize giving, and i was completely astonished to win the prize for the dissertation, the outstanding performance one, and the musicality award. It was the strangest but best feeling!
There followed a reception, in which we said goodbye to all the teachers, surprisingly without too many tears, and then headed off for a lovely meal with our families before displaying true stamina and making my way to our party.
As I was one of the organisers, I was a little bit worried how it would turn out. Would people enjoy themselves? Would it all go well? As it turned out, Beth and I had done a great job, it was a really good party with excellent music in a great venue, and I hope everyone enjoyed the last central party of the year!
I spent most of yesterday in bed. sleep hasn't been high on my list of priorities for the past four months, so i was catching up! I now have a few days before i head up to Leeds, and begin my new life- working so hard, learning like a sponge and really pushing myself as far as I can.
Its been great writing about all my experiences in this pivotal year of my life for ballet.co. I have always truly enjoyed it, and I hope you have enjoyed reading them as well, despite their lengthy nature sometimes! Its been a pleasure!!!
rym
Posted by Rym Kechacha at July 22, 2008 10:09 AM
