So you want to dance: Part 19 of series Postings discussion This link allows you to see others thoughts on this piece and contribute to the debate yourself if you want. We look to guarantee this link for a number of years, though after 3-6 months the page may be closed to further additions. Ballet.co's Doing Dance forum reviews by Anjuli Bai

This is a constant problem for the adult student. Finding a beginning class is difficult, but finding an adult intermediate class or beyond), in my experience, is even harder. You might have to round up other adults in similar circumstances and then all of you present yourselves to a teacher who may be willing to open a class.

That’s a possibility – but not probable. Do you think a teacher will let me join a teen class?

This depends very much on the teacher and her experience. I can, however, tell you that my experience as a teacher with this has been very positive. I found that any adults in the teen class calmed it down, rather than disrupted it

They would be laughing at me. I would feel very strange….like a cow among calves.

Or a doe among fawns! A better way to think about it! At that age children are mostly intent upon themselves and their peers. I don’t think they even really “see” the adults in their midst. They are a tribe unto themselves – busy bonding and competing within their own age group. They won’t see you as either someone with whom to bond or compete. Their energy will be directed amongst themselves.

Well, maybe it would be the other way around…..I might feel overwhelmed by their ability – their flexibility – their ……okay….youth!

So, is the answer then to never be in class with anyone younger or more flexible? In that case one might never even bother taking any class ever! On the contrary I think you will find that though the teens might bend a bit more, they also have their problems. Adults bring many assets to class and I found that adults more often had a salutary effect on the youngsters.

Like what?

Your adult work ethic. Your attention to details. Your desire to learn and analyze. Your willingness to try and perhaps not quite succeed, and try again. Your dedication despite the problems we each bring to class. Teens have a lot to learn from adult students. Though the teens won’t overtly learn (they will seem much too busy amongst themselves) the intelligent ones will in fact be learning from you. The atmosphere in the class will change and they will profit from it.

Another problem….maybe I would be holding the class back.

If that were a problem, the teacher would not be allowing you in the class in the first place. Each new student who comes into the class – regardless of age – has the potential of holding the class back. However, a teacher with good skills can overcome that by not only the work she presents, but also how she shapes it for each student.

This is beginning to sound a bit more hopeful. I usually get along well with kids so maybe it would work.

Most of us get along well with kids, because most of us have an affinity for them – we were kids ourselves! However, don’t confuse “getting along well” with “being a pal.” An adult student in the ballet class really shouldn’t try to be “one of the gang.” Be who you are: an adult – kind – polite – considerate – friendly – helpful (if asked) – but keep it appropriate. Don’t expect to share their lives, or activities or gossip. They are inveterate gossips and this is one thing from which the adult student must absolutely remain apart.

Be a kind, polite and considerate classmate and they will learn those qualities from you, but don’t try to go beyond that. They live in a separate world. Don’t try to enter it.

And remember…..always keep your sense of humor. You’ll need it both in watching them and for yourself.

Uh oh...

Can I tell you a story?

Sure….(why not? I’m stuck here in WORD anyway!)

I was taking an excellent professional level class at a well known school. The class met every morning (including Sundays) at 9 a.m. We were all adults at a proficient technical level. The teenagers had their classes in the afternoon after school. However, during the summer for two months the teen class joined ours as their teachers went on vacation. The teens were quite advanced and so technically it should all have worked out smoothly. But it didn’t.

The teacher who ran this entire school enjoyed setting up a competitive atmosphere that could get quite nasty and the teens were used to this and responded amongst themselves with debilitating and emotionally draining pranks, gossip and other nastiness. When they joined the adult class they brought those negative attributes with them.

So, while we enjoyed seeing their physical progress and their youthful beauty – they were otherwise very unbeautiful. They were disruptive, discourteous to the point of physical confrontation: playing pranks on the adults, shoving them, and literally taking over what had been a wonderful class of adult dancers.

The teacher noticing this did reprimand the kids, but only once, and within 30 minutes they were back to pushing, sneering and painful pranks. I was really upset. Some of the shyer adult dancers left, electing to sit out the summer rather than putting up with those very unpleasant kids. It made me sad to see these dedicated adults leave, but also made me very angry. How to deal with this? I surely didn’t want to stop taking the class for the summer – in fact couldn’t afford to and still maintain my dance performance schedule. Finding another class at this level was not an option.

So, I decided that only humor would work. I found a t-shirt that said:

“Age and Treachery Will Always Overcome Youth and Beauty”

I wore it over my leotard every day in class. Some of the kids laughed, some sneered but they never bothered me again.

Epilogue: This group of nasty teens eventually caused the demise of the entire school.